Have you ever had a time in life where you thought you were finally on the right track? You thought “This could be it”.. or “This might be what I’m meant to do”… Until you feel like you’ve just been run over by a truck when it turns out to be just another stepping stone. If you’re anything like me, every pivotal decision is just part of the journey to finally figuring out what I was put on this Earth for.
When I graduated High School I was interested in Science. I wanted to have a job that required expertise, I enjoyed, and would have moderate pay. I was accepted into a radiology program at my local college. I was required to do some job shadowing and thank God for that, because I realized it was not my calling. After some thought I realized that as much as I loved Science…the medical field wasn’t for me.
I decided to get an Associate of Arts degree for general knowledge and to buy some time to figure out my life. I would have never expected to enjoy accounting. I hated math growing up and I wasn’t all that great at it. I was taking a personal finance class and I actually enjoyed it. I was even good at it, who knew? So the next semester I majored in accounting.
Along with taking accounting classes I was working for a factory over nights at this time. The factory told me that they would have an office position for me (most likely) once I graduated college. The plan was to pay off my schooling as I went, and I did get a lot paid off, but I found that I liked to renovate and decorate my home which required a bit of change out of my pocket. While my friends were partying and going on trips, I was sanding my floors and painting ceilings.
After some time and hearing stories of other employees that had received the same promise of an office position, a secretary position opened up at my relative’s business. I wasn’t going to chance never getting that office position in the factory so I accepted the offer at my relative’s business. This position involved everything I was going to school for and I was going to work with some great people. It really helped me gain some experience in my field of study, but it didn’t work out in the end.
Although it was sad to leave that job (still love my old bosses!), another door opened up for me… after months of applying for secretary and accounting positions, I landed a kitchen designer job. This had to be a dream come true right??
I accepted the offer and began training a little over a month ago. I learned an incredible amount over this time period (you would not believe how much there is to know about cabinetry) and was able to help create designs. I actually was able to get over an anxiety of mine…for the past few years I have had anxiety being in a vehicle for “long” distances (sometimes just a half hour)…I’m not sure if this came about when I started working overnights and taking classes at the same time and never leaving the house?? Whatever the cause, the constant driving really helped me get over this hurdle.
I also was able to gain confidence. I wouldn’t say I’m horrible with people, I’m a bit shy. This job allowed me to go into customers’ homes and speak with them and spread the knowledge about our products. I also learned a bit about the business side of designing and how it is important to promote yourself. As much as I loved designing and the job itself, it didn’t work out for me. (and as much as I’d love to let off some steam and explain what had happened, I’ll bite my tongue and just leave it at that. )
…here I am once again wounded by that damn truck.
One door closed, another door opened, and here we are pounded shut again.. It’s all a road map to an unknown destination.
One thing that keeps me going is to look at my past…from all the great to shitty things that have happened…it’s all happened for a reason. So, I will have to hold onto faith that something good will come out of this…that the best is yet to come. (at least so they say)